Another Ponitless Exercise

BLiP Football vary faithfully recreates those handheld football games from the 1970's, which means it's just as boring and repetitive as that Mattel Football reissue you bought 4 years ago at Wal-Mart and played once. OK, that's not entirely true. BLiP Football has an "enhanced" feature which allows you to switch from red players on a black field to red and yellow players on a black field with blue endzones. Not even Mattel Football II had that.

Enhanced mode. Feels like you're right there in the stadium, doesn't it?

The screen is laid out just like the old LED games, with a scoreboard on top, then a nine-yard long playfield and several non-functioning buttons. The function of each button is mapped to the Atari joystick. Pressing up or down moves your blip up or down. The fire button moves it forward (no backtracking). Just like the original, the scoreboard is only capable of giving you half the information at a time, and only does so at your request. Pressing left gives you the score and the time left in the quarter. Pressing right gives you the status (down, yards to go and the ball's current location on the field).

There is no passing in BLiP Football. You have no teammates to pass the ball to. No teammates to block for you. All you can do is run at the five opposing blips until you reach the edge of the screen, at which point you reappear on the other side with the defenders right where you left them. This makes is possible to rip off some pretty long runs if the computer gives you a straight path. And something to keep in mind when it's fourth and 1, the defense always lines up in such a way that you can get 2 yards just by blindly rushing ahead.

3rd and 8. Looks like I should pass. Oh, wait...

The question to ask here is why. Why make a console version of a portable game that doesn't take advantage of the greater (even talking about the Atari 2600) capabilities of the console (not counting the "enhanced" mode)? Why not keep the blip look and feel but add a true 2-player mode (or, for that matter, a true 1-player mode)? Considering that this game is twice the cost of the game it's based on, it would be nice to get something extra for the money, rather than lose something now that the game is no longer portable.

My Imaginary Conversation with the Winner of Ebay Item #250189173724

I don't know about you, but when I spend over 300 dollars on something, I want to, if not enjoy it, at least get some use out of it. That's why I wanted to interview eBay user generalhellfire, who paid $330 for The Music Machine. I wanted to know what motivates someone to spend that kind of money on something that's only valuable because nobody wanted it in the first place. However, generalhellfire never responded to my request, so I'm left to imagine how the interview would have gone.

Me: You must already own every video game worth owning if you're willing to spend $330 for The Music Machine.

Him: Yup, got 'em all. Air Raid. Stadium Events. Power Lords.

Me: Those games are terrible.

Him: Terribly rare, you mean. Admit it, you're jealous.

Me: I admit I'm jealous of the amount of disposeable income you seem to have. Have you ever considered using that money for something a little more worthwhile?

Him: I've slept with a hooker.

Me: Good for you. But what about buying something you might get some lasting enjoyment out of?

Him: Like a mail-order bride?

Me: No. Why not use that money on an Xbox 360?

Him: But lots of people have 360s. I want to be cool.

Me: So you bought The Music Machine because you thought owning a rare game would make you look cool to all the other guys on the Digital Press forum?

Him: Well, yeah? Why else are video games for?

25 Years Too Late

AtariAge forum member BigO has created an Atari 5200 controller that isn't a total piece of garbage. Learn more about this possibly miraclulous device here.

Super Fun Matching Game #1

Match the arcade game on the left with its Atari 2600 counterpart on the right. Answers below.


1-D Blueprint. 2-C Buck Rogers - Planet of Zoom. 3-A Tutankham. 4-B Zaxxon.

Video Games - The Board Game

Growing up an only child in a neighborhood with few other kids, I spent a lot of time playing video games when there wasn't anyone else around (or when I got tired of hitting that 2 out, bottom of the ninth home run in game 7 of the World Series in the back yard with my trusty Steve Garvey bat and a Wiffle Ball). Someone at Milton Bradley must have been concerned about the anti-social behavior fostered by video games because that company started churning out board game versions of every even remotely popular video game of the era. Not only were these games nowhere near as much fun as the original versions, but each of them required at least two people to play.

Running out of games to ruin, but still looking to cash in on the video game craze, MB upped the ante with Electronic Arcade Mania. Instead of a single game, Arcade Mania was based on the competitive gaming concept popularized by Twin Galaxies. It also required four people to play.


The centerpiece of Arcade Mania is The Machine, a 9-inch tall plastic arcade cabinet with 9 buttons and 9 LEDs. Using plastic overlays, The Machine can be transformed into 4 different games: Alien Raiders (kinda like Space Invaders), Rattler (kinda like Centipede), Sneak Attack (kinda like Missile Command) and Run Amuk (kinda like Berzerk). Each player selects an overlay and a corresponding pawn and that become their game. Whenever another player lands on a square with your game on it, the two of you play and whoever gets the highest score wins some chips. The other 2 players can bet their chips on who they think will be the winner. The goal is to have the most chips when the game ends.

Considering that many parents in the early 1980's considered video game playing delinquent behavior on par with doing drugs and worshiping Satan, combining gaming with the unsavory practice of gambling wasn't a great marketing decision on Milton Bradley's part. That would explain the game's obscurity, even next to Zaxxon the board game.

The four games manage to be unique and playable (though not necessarily fun), despite being nothing more than the same 9 lights blinking in different patterns. But there's no reason to limit yourself to the games programmed into The Machine. Not in the 2000's. With roughly 96% of the titles released for the Wii being collections of mini-games, it would be easy to have players select games from one of those. Or, if you want to keep the retro vibe intact, there are several classic video game collections available for current systems to choose from.

Arcade Mania will add a nostalgic twist to your next game night. Or it will make three of your friends hate you. Fortunately, you'll have your video games to keep you company should that happen.